Get Happy! Life Hacks You Need in Your Life

She also liked to shut up! Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun? Why not indeed! Good news, everyone! There's a report on TV with some very bad news! There's one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain!

I usually try to keep my sadness pent up inside where it can fester quietly as a mental illness. Oh dear! She's stuck in an infinite loop, and he's an idiot! Well, that's love for you. Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?

  1. The alien mothership is in orbit here. If we can hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate.
  2. Shut up and get to the point!
  3. You're going to do his laundry?

Is the Space Pope reptilian!?

Hello Morbo, how's the family? We don't have a brig. I'll get my kit! Well, then good news! It's a suppository. Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.

  • Just once I'd like to eat dinner with a celebrity who isn't bound and gagged.
  • What are their names?
  • Guess again.

Oh, I don't have time for this. I have to go and buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it, making people wait behind me while I complain. And I'd do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

I didn't ask for a completely reasonable excuse! I asked you to get busy! I haven't felt much of anything since my guinea pig died. Michelle, I don't regret this, but I both rue and lament it. Alright, let's mafia things up a bit. Joey, burn down the ship. Clamps, burn down the crew.

Just once I'd like to eat dinner with a celebrity who isn't bound and gagged. Kif might! Too much work. Let's burn it and say we dumped it in the sewer. Maybe I love you so much I love you no matter who you are pretending to be.

You'll have all the Slurm you can drink when you're partying with Slurms McKenzie! That's the ONLY thing about being a slave. Guards! Bring me the forms I need to fill out to have her taken away! Oh right. I forgot about the battle.

Hello, little man. I will destroy you! Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun! We can't compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral! Ah, yes! John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a chord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree.

We're also Santa Claus! Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them? I just told you! You've killed me! All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that's why I'm transferring to business school!

Why did you bring us here? Robot 1-X, save my friends! And Zoidberg! Oh Leela! You're the only person I could turn to; you're the only person who ever loved me. Throw her in the brig.

You don't know how to do any of those. There, now he's trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors! That's the ONLY thing about being a slave. Yeah, and if you were the pope they'd be all, "Straighten your pope hat." And "Put on your good vestments."

I can explain. It's very valuable. What are their names? Leela, are you alright? You got wanged on the head. Goodbye, cruel world. Goodbye, cruel lamp. Goodbye, cruel velvet drapes, lined with what would appear to be some sort of cruel muslin and the cute little pom-pom curtain pull cords. Cruel though they may be…

Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography. Look, everyone wants to be like Germany, but do we really have the pure strength of 'will'? This is the worst part. The calm before the battle.

OK, if everyone's finished being stupid. I meant 'physically'. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually? Now Fry, it's been a few years since medical school, so remind me. Disemboweling in your species: fatal or non-fatal?